i lied.
family gathering. looked at the food, thinks: why is everything so oily. i cant eat anything here. if i eat, i will breakdown. i wont be able to concentrate on my studies later. skipskipskip.what i did: took a playe, took a bit of food to make it look as if i have eaten. walk to the living room w the plate say: i've eaten already when asked to eat more. told dad i had to go home to study.
home: hungry, ate food. study, night snack. sleep
i really cant handle outside food.
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ooh but you can handle outside food. You just do not know you can. You let yourself accept that you wont eat at or around your family that day, and thus it was made your destiny. Had you accepted you needed to eat before you went, you may have been able to eat with your family. you accepted and made up your mind you wanted to go home eat dinner and snack isolated by yourself. i know this feeling OH so well because i am currently dealing with the same problem. acceptance of what you are DOING (not 'need to' but ARE changing, make it active) will have different results
ReplyDeleteThanks for commenting on my blog, it's great to have support! You'd be suprised how similar "outside food" is to your safe food. It's only scary because you don't have that control over exactly what it is. The best way to overcome it is to just jump in and do it. It get's easier the more you do.
ReplyDelete<3 tori
malpaz- i think u r rite, i "decided" i was not going to eat any of the food there and so i did not. something to wk on ....
ReplyDeletetori- i seem to be unable to"just do it", always back out in the end. guess i need to find the courage to "just do it".